Location
The location of your wedding may be the single most important choice you make. The city or town in which your wedding takes place will dictate the types of venues available, influence the tone of the wedding, and most definitely affect the total cost for you and your guests. It’s also one of the earliest decisions you will need to make in the planning process when you’re still just learning all the details about what’s involved in planning a wedding.
Local Weddings
The simplest decision is to have the wedding in the city you reside. You will be able to meet one-on-one with every vendor and there is much less room for error when you can see and meet the people you’re dealing with in person rather than over a phone and fax machine. You will have total control over every decision and can easily take care of things after work or on the weekends. If you still live in the hometown you’re from, you will have no problem getting help from old friends and relatives.
Hometown Weddings
In today’s modern world, less and less of us stay in the neighbourhood we grew up in. Perhaps you’re from smalltown, USA and now you’re a in professional living in the big city. Or maybe after college, you decided to try a different coast. Whatever the reason, you and your fiancée may still have strong attachment to your hometown of want to make it as easy as possible for your family to attend the wedding. In this case, your best option may be to hold the wedding in your hometown. The good news is that you have relatives and friends there who you can trust and will help you coordinate details. The negative is that if you’re unable to travel there often enough, you give up some control of the wedding. Maybe your mom, as well-meaning as she is, has a very different vision for your wedding than you do. Or perhaps, your high-school friend who told you she will totally help out has problems finding time in her busy schedule when push comes to shove.
Destination Wedding
A very popular choice today is the destination wedding. Many couples are deciding to exchange vows on an exotic island or some other location that they think will be provide the most perfect background to their wedding ceremony. While these can often be the most spectacular weddings, they are also the hardest to plan and most expensive–for both you and your guests.
Keep in mind, if attendance is important to you, it’s likely that many invited guests will NOT come to a destination wedding (if you’re trying to plan a smaller wedding, this may be an advantage).
Furthermore, it’s trickier to coordinate details of a destination wedding since you are so far away from the location, band, caterer, florist, etc. Negotiating details over the phone can be error prone and frustrating, especially if you’re dealing with time zones or language barriers. Some tips:
- Consider planning during the off-season to keep prices down
- Check into legal requirements for getting married there? Do you need to be a resident? Do you need to show up in person a month before?
- Definitely visit the location at least once. Don’t trust pictures from a website or brochure.
- Hire a wedding consultant at the destination to assist.
Ceremony venue
There are many factors that couples consider for where to hold the ceremony. There are many choices. The obvious ones are a church of synagogue, but there are many others. We’ve seen weddings held at parks, museums, amphitheaters, mansions, hotels, libraries, a zoo, and even a movie theatre screening room.
Here are some general questions to consider:
- Can the location accommodate the number of guests?
- Is the location typically used to perform weddings and do the people there have experience with wedding ceremonies?
- Is there space for a receiving line?
- Is there adequate parking?
- How far is it from the reception?
- Is the location available for a rehearsal?
- What is the cost of the location?
- If the location is outside, what are the mitigations for bad weather?
If you can, find the names and contact details of people who were married at the location so you can ask them questions about their experience.
House of Worship
For couples that are religious, the choice is often obvious since they want to pick a church or temple of their particular faith in the location of the wedding. Perhaps, this is the church you’ve been going to all your life, perhaps it’s the most convenient church of your denomination, or perhaps it’s been recommended by a friend or relative. Also, you don’t need to be very religious to have your wedding in a house of worship, but it’s definitely a very personal choice. If it’s an interfaith marriage, it may be trickier to find a place that will marry the couple.
Questions to ask when picking a house of worship:
- Are there restrictions on the type of ceremony?
- Do you have your choice of officiant or does the location provide a list to choose from?
- What kind of music can you play?
- Are there restrictions on the faiths of the couple?
- Are there restrictions on whether one of the participants has already been married?
- Does the location require you to be a member?
- Does the location provide a discount if you are a member?
- Does the location allow filming and photos?
Public Venue
A public venue such as a museum or park can be a beautiful place to hold a wedding and may complement the values of the couple. Maybe you’re both graduate students and wish to get married in a museum or library to reflect your shared values of education and the arts. Perhaps, you’re met on a hiking trip and worship the outdoors and so you want to hold the wedding in a park, at a zoo, or near the water. Whatever the choice, public venues can be tricky because of all the rules and restrictions in place. You will want to make sure to go every detail of what you can and can’t do at the location to make sure it fits your needs. You may even want to ask for the names and telephone numbers of other people who were married there so you can talk to them and find out if there were any gotchas.
Here are some ideas for non-religious locations:
- Public park or beach front
- Museum
- Concert Hall
- Theater
- Garden
- Zoo
- Library
- Art Gallery
- Country Club
- School/University
- Home Wedding
It may seem appealing to hold a wedding at home, but it can be a difficult proposition. Most homes don’t have the space or the right layout to meet the demands of a wedding.
Reception venue
The choice of venue of reception will be a strong influence on the tone and quality of the wedding. Most of the time will be spent at the reception and you want to make sure that you and your guests have a fabulous time and fond memories of the occasion.
There are many factors to consider when picking a venue for the reception. These include
- Whether the venue lends itself to the types of decoration and mood you want to create. Can you affix decorations to the walls? What can and can’t you change about the venue? Is it private enough or is it visible to onlookers?
- Cost to rent the venue. Whether cost includes other items such as tables and chairs. How many hours are included in the rental and whether there are overtime charges?
- Whether the venue providers their own caterer, a list of approved caterers, or lets you bring in your external caterer
- The facilities of the venue including parking, a kitchen for the caterer, and restrooms for the guests.
- Are there suitable electrical outlets for musicians and/or DJ? Can you control the temperature and lighting?
A great place to start is friends and families. If your in a local location, you can tap the people you know for recommendations since they probably have attended many weddings already. You want to start a year or more in advance since venues often have long lead times for reservations. Start calling early and make appointments. When viewing a location, ask lots of questions and make sure the person you’re working with appears well-informed. If not, ask to speak with somebody else or try another location. Remember, you’re putting a lot of faith in these people to make your wedding a success and you don’t want to deal with anybody who is inexperienced.
Reserve early. Popular venues book up early. It can’t hurt to reserve a place a year or more in advance. If you’re trying to reserve during a popular date like Memorial Day or Labor Day Weekend, you may have to book even further in advance. The earlier, the better.
Originally written for weddingplanninghints.com.